Life is not fair

Life is not fair, even though I want it to be. Bad things happen to good people; good things happen to bad people. Sometimes I don’t know which I am, but I do now that there are things happening to me that I would just as soon pass on.

So yes, I occasionally go to that “why me” place, but I never stay there very long, because, for the life of me I can’t answer the question, “If not me, then who?” What is going on for me right now is not something that I would wish on my worst enemy, so I have to ask again, “if not me, then who?”

If you believe that everything happens for a reason, which I did once but don’t anymore, then maybe you can believe this is payback for something I did in an earlier life (if you believe in that), or this is happening because I am strong enough to handle it. If you believe any of that, good for you. I will not try to talk you out of it; I just don’t happen to believe it anymore.  I think more along the lines of, “it is what it is, deal with it.”

So I have to just put on my big girl panties and deal with this. Well, I guess there is always the option of just crawling into a hole and ignoring the world; I  would be a liar if I didn’t admit to sometimes feeling that this is the way to go. But in the end I just can’t give up on everything. This is most likely not going to kill me, so I guess I better learn to adapt and live with it.