Turn about is fair play

I am very tired of hearing this from people: “Why didn’t she come forward sooner? Why did she wait so long?” Have you been paying attention? Have you seen how people treat someone who comes forward with rape or harassment charges? It must be one of the scariest things in the world to do, to put something into the public realm when you know that there are always going to be people  willing to tear you apart for coming forward.

Instead of blaming the victim here, how about doing some real investigation into what happened? Let’s not assume that someone is lying – let’s find out the truth. How about holding people accountable for lying? And if I hear one more time “Boys will be boys,” then I may just run down the street screaming. What exactly does that mean? It is starting to feel like what is meant is “boys will do whatever they want and then lie to get out of any consequences.”

I don’t think we should automatically believe all accusers, but think about this: what does she have to gain? It’s not like this is easy to do, or that people aren’t ready to come out an call her names & question her veracity. I do have to ask the question – which of these two people has been caught in telling lies already?

And here is what I know: all males are not like this. There are plenty of males who do not think it is their right to do whatever vile thing comes to their minds. There are plenty of males who treat all people – men and women – with respect. And it is not them that I am complaining about here.

These men need to teach their children – boys and girls – that “boys will be boys” is not an excuse for anything. Yes, there are men like that out there. And I am asking – no, begging – them to come forward and call BS when they see and hear BS.

I am really hoping that our society can fix this without having the pendulum swing all the way the other way. I really don’t want to see women treating men the way men have gotten away with treating women for all these years. On the other hand, I have to admit that sometimes I feel that turnabout is fair play.

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