My circus and my monkeys

Sometimes I get stuck in a place where I want someone to hear me out, and not pass judgment or offer ways out of what I am stuck in. It’s not that I want to wallow in whatever my issue is, it’s just that it probably took me a while to get to a place where I realized that telling someone my story could actually help me to get out of it. Hearing my story out loud and having it witnessed by someone can help me get to the next step – whatever it is. If that person’s response makes me feel like I am doing it (“it” being life) wrong, or I am an idiot, or I am not capable of fixing it myself, then it may be a long time before I am willing to share my story again. And that would probably be a bad thing.

I know and understand that most people’s initial response to hearing something that is making someone else feel bad is to want to fix it for them. And I can’t speak for anyone else, but my initial response would be to let them. And I know from experience that it is important to me to fix things myself. Have you heard that saying, “Not my circus, not my monkeys?” Well, sometimes it IS my circus and my monkeys, and it is my mess to clean up!

So if someone asks you to listen to them, then please just listen to them. If they want advice they can ask for it.

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