Live fully in the present

I don’t know what’s going to happen to me; I don’t know if I want to know. I sometimes think about this, and almost always come to the same conclusion: I think I want to learn to live with the uncertainty.

It might be nice to know if I were going to get better, but I don’t know that I would want to know if I were going to get worse. So far I have adapted to everything that has happened; I am rolling with the punches. It’s not always fun, but I don’t think I want to know if I am never going to get better.

In my fantasy brain, I think I would like to know if I am going to get better but not if I am going to get worse. But then I think if I am not told that I will get better, doesn’t that mean that I will get worse? I don’t think that is going to work.

I wonder if knowing the future would help me to prepare for it, but I think if I knew how bad things would get I would spend my time worrying about what’s coming. I think I would choose to learn to live fully in the present, with what I know now and not worrying about what will come.

I have to work on “living fully in the present.”

Leave a Reply

You can use these HTML tags

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>