I am having a hard time right now. I think that maybe I am in mourning: mourning what I thought was going to happen that doesn’t seem possible anymore; mourning the things I used to be able to do, that I no longer can; mourning how I thought people cared about each other, that doesn’t seem to be true anymore; mourning people I thought were friends who apparently were friends only as long as I kept doing what I was doing and was the one who kept in touch; mourning the common decency I thought we all had, but we all apparently don’t (maybe we never did).
I think I need something to get me out of my funk. I am starting by contributing a small amount toward helping someone in Zimbabwe go to college – I can’t send much, but I am sure every little bit helps.
I think I have the idea now – it’s not always easy to come up with things I can still do to help others, but I think that’s exactly what I need to make me feel better about the world right now. I can’t do big stuff, but I can do some small stuff. It seems insignificant, but I wonder if any good act is insignificant.
To paraphrase a quotation I have read: as one person I can’t change the world, but I can try to one person’s world.
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