Think about what you are going to say

I don’t need someone to remind me to be grateful for what I have – I already am. I am also dealing with some crappy stuff right now, and the truth is that I am NOT grateful for it.

It’s fine for someone with cancer (or some other disease) to decide that they are grateful they went through it because it made them more aware, or more grateful, or more whatever. That’s a great thing; it is always good to find reasons to be grateful.

And it is NOT okay to tell someone going through something difficult (like cancer) that they should be grateful for it. They may actually come to be grateful later that they went through it, but that will happen, if it happens, when it happens, and pointing it out sooner does nothing good for them.

Please think about how the other person hears what you are saying. Someone going through a hard time might hear that you think they are not being grateful enough for the suffering they are going through, that they are doing it (whatever it is) wrong. I am willing to bet that you did not mean it that way, but that is how it may sound. Be sure your execution matches you intentions.

I know it’s hard, but think about how what you say is going to land.

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