I have such a hard time leaving the past in the past. I know that it belongs there, but that doesn’t make it any easier.
There are many reasons that the past is hard to leave behind. There are some occasions in my life where I still feel that I got a raw deal, and that is hard to let go of. There are some cases where I feel I have been totally misunderstood, and I have a hard time letting go of the need to try to explain myself. And there are a couple occasions where something happened. I don’t know what caused it, or why it happened, but it did and everything changed afterwards. And then there is the case of living in the past, thinking – or maybe wishing – I can still do what I used to do.
It is important for me to let these things go. Even if I had a chance to talk to someone about the past, chances are I wouldn’t change their thinking about what went down. I am not naive enough to think that I was always in the right – perhaps something I did pushed someone else’s buttons and caused them to act the way they acted. Maybe it didn’t have anything to do with me. As for wishing I could still do what I used to do – that kind of thinking just makes me miserable. Wanting to be able to do what I could do 10 years ago, or even 3 years ago, is keeping me from living in the now and doing what I can do now. It may even be keeping me from figuring out what it is that I can do now.
So I am making a resolution right now: I am blessing the past, trying to learn any lessons that I can from it, asking for forgiveness where I need it,and letting it go. What’s done is done. It is time for me to move on.
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